It’s Monday night, and there’s nothing good on the telly. You’re in the thick of exams and tired of studying. It’s been almost a week since you’ve seen a carrot and your fridge freezer’s so empty it’s like Frosty the Snowman ransacked it in the middle of the night. There is no alternative; you grab the laptop and get onto your good friend Dominoes; double cheese and a coke please. Suddenly you remember that you have that Love/Hate boxset from Christmas still to watch. Then you find a biscuit in the sofa. Your night is starting to look up!
You decide that this bountiful luck must be shared, so you give your only friend a quick text to see if they’re up for buzzing over for some serious banter. Only they’re not, because their mam promised to buy them a new phone if they get a million ‘likes’ on Facebook. So they now have to spend their evening desecrating the newsfeeds of 500+ acquaintances and strangers with a delightful self-portrait and poorly written sign stating their plight. Night ruined.
What this friend doesn’t understand is that the chance of actually receiving one million ‘likes’ is about as slim as George Michael fathering many mini George Michaels. After all, why would people ‘like’ a photo from which they receive no emotional gain? Alas, the trend of begging for ‘likes’ on Facebook in order to gain attention in the real world has become quite commonplace.
Initially Facebook users weren’t greedy, and settled for a mere 50 likes to force-feed themselves a spoon of cinnamon, or 100 ‘likes’ for their girlfriend to make them a sandwich. This was amusing for a while, but began to die off as people realized the ridiculousness of the whole exercise. In recent times the flame has reignited, some requesting ‘likes’ for cars and bikes, others requesting them for babies…
Yes, babies. (She doesn’t love you man.)
What puzzles me is how the authors of such posts connect receiving ‘likes’ on Facebook with receiving rewards, as if it’s some form of achievement; like mowing the lawn, or something similarly gratifying. Perhaps if these social network offenders were to, I don’t know, get out from in front of the computer and maybe (this might be a radical concept) DO SOMETHING in order to reach their desired goal, such as participating in a real social life or just working a job; then it might be a little faster to achieve. Or, they could always just continue to do what they’re doing, which is somewhat entertaining for us all.
If you are one of the many who look to the humble Facebook user to receive financial or emotional satisfaction; just remember, ‘likes’ on Facebook won’t change the colour of your hair or add to your bank account. They won’t protect your son ‘Megatron’ from a life of emotional abuse and they certainly won’t get your girlfriend to make you a sandwich.
Have you seen any strange ones floating around your Facebook newsfeed? Share them with Aunty Nicola.